November 5, 2007
Our pal Pervez
Sure the Brits have been gamely along for the ride long before day one, but it’s hard to argue that Pakistan is not the United States’ most critical ally in the War on Terror. Yup, the very place where the significant when convenient Osama bin Laden has been hiding out for the last six years is also such a great friend of his sworn enemy that Our Fine President does somersaults to justify an allegiance to such a volatile nuclear powered dictatorship.
Whoa, that was a mouthful right there, and it sure explains a lot with those last few words, but before all that, a bit of backstory to explain just why Pakistan is on my mind at this minute.
If you follow the news, you probably saw Pakistani authorities beating up angry hordes of lawyers. (Hordes, is that the right term for a large group of lawyers? Maybe it’s a pride of lawyers, or a swarm, a flock or a pod?) Yup, those lawyers were out in the streets protesting Pakistani dictator, erm President Pervez Musharraf’s decision to cancel elections scheduled for January due to a state of emergency.
Musharraf came to power in a 1999 military coup and while some elections have been allowed during his extended reign, the fairness of the contests has been less than dubious. He’s also a secular leader in the Muslim world and thus he’s been a marginal ally since Sept. 11. In exchange for lots of aide from the United States, Musharraf’s Pakistan has fought the local terrorists and al Qaida to a degree. Of course those were always mutual enemies and bin Laden’s been able to hide in Pakistan with Musharraf’s rule too unsteady to risk the consequences of pursuing the popular terrorist in the religious mountain regions where he’s been known to hide.
So Musharraf’s on our side when it is also convenient for him. Our Fine President loves to point out that Musharraf’s been the target of numerous assassination attempts at the hands our enemies, as if this makes our nation’s support of his regime all the more justified instead of explaining his extra incentive for working with us against a common enemy.
In response to canceling the elections, Our Fine President stood up for his favorite principles of freedom and democracy and said, “Previous to his decision, we’d made it clear that these emergency measures were, you know, would undermine democracy. Having said that … President Musharraf has been a strong fighter against extremists and radicals … he understands the dangers posed by radicals and extremists. After all, they tried to kill him three or four times. And our hope is that he will restore democracy as quickly as possible…
“I certainly hope he does take my advice and the advice of the prime minister of Turkey and the advice of a lot of other figures. And so that’s all we can do, is continue to work with the president as well as others in the Pak government to make it abundantly clear the position of the United States. And then, obviously, we’ll deal with it if something other than that happens.”
By now Our Fine President sure has plenty of experience at dealing with those something others because his plans always turn out like directions from someone who didn’t know the way. So we’ve been told that we’re fighting in Iraq to bring the wonders of freedom and democracy to a downtrodden people who are so much better off since being freed from their dictator, and now we’re standing up behind a different dictator instead of boldly fighting to bring the wonders of freemocracy to the poor Pakistani people.
There aren’t threats of sanctions or United Nations resolutions against Musharraf’s autonomous decision and there won’t be any as long as we need him where he is. The end of Musharraf’s rule is one of the worst things that could happen in the world made by Our Fine President. In fact, true democracy in Pakistan could bring about a fundamentalist Muslim Pakistani state with control of a modest nuclear arsenal. That would probably not be a great thing.
By supporting this Pakistani dictatorship Our Fine President has always been proving his true mettle. To him fighting the terrorists and getting them back for what they did is even more important than upholding the principles of democracy the Constitution he swore an oath about. The way he sees it, there’s no rule that can’t be broken, suspended or ended in the name of safety and the battle against the concept of terror.
Of course, that might be complicating things a bit. Our Fine President might be so tolerant of his pal Pervez because in him he sees a colleague and possibly even someone to look up too. After all he’s been in power a few years longer and keeps finding new creative ways to change the rules to stay there.
Hopefully this doesn’t spur Our Fine President’s competitive side. I mean his aides are about to be held in Contempt of Congress, but that’s still small time in the flouting of a democratic system. If Our Fine President decides Musharraf threw down a gauntlet with this one all those presidential candidates will have wasted an unbelievable amount of time with all those debates.